The quiet shifts that came with motherhood—from spending habits to self-care

Life Changes After Becoming a Mom

Since becoming a mom, it’s no surprise that many things in my life had to change. I was laid off from my job while six months pregnant, then went into early labor at 34 weeks and three days. My daughter spent two and a half weeks in the NICU, and once we brought her home, the realities of parenting really kicked in. At three months post-partum, I returned to working at a job I landed one month before going into labor, but that role only lasted a few months. It was difficult at first, but it ultimately turned out to be a blessing in disguise

After many conversations, my husband and I decided to pivot from a dual-income household to a single income. This shift came with sacrifices from both of us, while still trying to maintain the quality of life we wanted for our daughter.

Transitioning to a Single-Income Household

The first thing I did was cancel my overpriced gym membership. I loved my workout classes, but they were no longer in our budget.

I also stopped buying myself clothes. The reality was, I didn’t need to spend fifty-plus dollars on blouses anymore. I wasn’t going into an office or having in-person or online meetings. I took a look at what I was doing, how I was moving through my days, and decided I no longer wanted to spend that much on clothes. Being okay with fifteen-dollar shirts and twenty-five-dollar jeans became my new normal.

Adjusting to a New Home and Shared Responsibilities

At the beginning of 2025, we moved to a new home and a new city, which meant adjusting to a new routine. We also stopped having a house cleaner. This was a nice-to-have at our previous home, which was just 900 square feet, but with our new home being about 50% larger, it came with a much bigger cleaning expense—one we didn’t have room for in our budget. So, reality check: I became the house cleaner. That said, my husband and I agreed we’d both take on household responsibilities. I’m so grateful that he handles the laundry, trash, and pretty much all of the outside care for our home, while I mainly focus on the inside.

Cooking More Meals at Home

I also began focusing more on cooking meals for us. This is a constant work in progress. At the end of the day, after chasing a toddler, taking her to art and music classes, the park, playdates, and more, finding the energy and time to cook can feel overwhelming. Because of that, meal prepping as much as possible has recently become a priority for me.

Redefining Self-Care Outside the Home

My self-care outside of the home looks different now as well. I no longer get my hair and nails done every four to six weeks. Over time, I noticed my nails became brittle from gel polish, and with more information available about potential long-term effects, I decided it wasn’t something I needed to do as often.

As for my hair, I found a new hairstylist who fits my needs without compromising quality or appearance. Just because I became a mom doesn’t mean I stopped caring about how I look. In fact, since becoming a mom—and getting older—my need for quality hair care has only increased. I no longer get a cut and color or highlights at every appointment, which used to be every five to eight weeks. Now, I usually opt for a cut and toner touch-up, with a full color touch-up about once every six months. I get a haircut about every twelve weeks, though sometimes I stretch it to eight weeks if it starts to feel unmanageable.

Prioritizing Our Daughter in Our Budget

Lastly, allocating our budget toward our daughter has become our new normal. Because we faced many obstacles in getting pregnant, we decided we’d do everything we can to ensure she’s raised to be kind, thoughtful, and caring toward others. That means exposing her to a variety of social environments and activities—many of which cost money—so we intentionally allocate a portion of our budget to experiences for her.